Considering the Singular "They"

Sometimes it's hard to be someone who learned all their grammar in the 1950's. My initial reaction to use of they for a gender fluid person was that of an English teacher from the last century: “They can’t do that!”

But the more I read and the more I considered the very real case of those born somewhere in the middle of the spectrum that is gender, the more I began to accept this jarring usage, albeit while gritting my teeth a bit.

Recently, in editing one of the submissions for my class, I ran into a paragraph where a tarot reader is explaining the card for The Mage and says of the figure on the card ‘They’re pointing up with one hand…” As I was prepared to correct that they, I noticed that the writer had described the mage as androgynous. Aha! I pulled back my electronic red pencil, feeling inordinately proud of myself for having made this shift.

I refuse to be like the folks who still cling to the two spaces after a period or never split an infinitive despite the change in most modern style books. As long as I’m being paid for editing, I owe it to the writers to stay up to date and aware of current usage.

But I have found myself wishing there were a gender neutral pronoun so that they would continue to be plural forever.

Then I realized–we’ve been using they to refer to a single person for years--in cases where the gender is unknown. As in:

 Someone left a note on my car

Who was it?

They didn’t sign it

Or look back at that first sentence. 'Someone who learned all their grammar..."

 I'm that someone and I know my gender, yet I didn't write her.

Weird.

Between You and Me --Confessions of a Comma Queen

"Die heiresses! Die heiresses!" I repeated over and over as I moved around the living room, applying polish to the dusty, mildew-pocked furniture.

An odd mantra for house-cleaning? You bet. But I'd just come across a surefire way to remember how to pronounce diaeresis--those two dots that The New Yorker and other staid publication put over the second o in cooperate. (I never do, preferring to live dangerously and also because it's a pain to do on the laptop.)  

In the course of my teaching, occasionally someone will ask about this usage and I've been guilty of calling this mark "those two little dots" or "an umlaut" (incorrect unless you're writing German.) So I am delighted to add this bit of knowledge to my fund of trivia.

Yes, I've been reading another book about grammar and usage. Mary Norris's delightful Between You and Me is part grammar book and part memoir, including Norris's thirty some years at The New Yorker, as well as an early stint as a foot checker at a public pool and later as a milkmanwoman.

From tips on pencils, erasers, and pencil sharpeners to a discussion of hyphens, en dashes, and em dashes--including the hyphen in the title Moby-Dick, to a consideration of proposed gender-neutral pronouns (I hate the use of they for someone of indeterminate gender--they is plural, dammit! but rather like a proposal to use ey, em, or eir) to a hilarious chapter ("F**K THIS SH*T) on the proliferation of profanity in modern prose, the book is a gem. 

I loved it. Especially recommended for my fellow word nerds.

There's an excellent review HERE.

Snark As A Verb?

It's happened again -- a writer in one of my classes uses snark as a verb  -- as in, "Oh, I'm sure you do," she snarked, and I cringe as if someone had run a fingernail down a blackboard.  

Merriam Webster says that snark (used as a noun to mean an irreverent sarcasm) first came into use (as a noun) in 1999. (Yes, I know about Lewis Carroll's "The Hunting of the Snark" and I'm not sure there's any connection.)

Spell check seems to acknowledge snarky but no other iterations of snark. Still, an online search reveals several examples of snark as a verb. 

I still hate it.

I know, I know, English is a living, evolving language and I'm old enough to remember actual blackboards and chalk and am therefore probably more set in my grammatical preferences.  

In my opinion, snark et al are still a bit slangy and not appropriate for all uses. Dialogue? Sure, go at it. Or if the voice the writer is cultivating is a slangy one, then fine. But, in general narration? 

What do you think? Do you use snark in speech or writing? Do you use it as a verb? (I won't judge, I promise.) I want to hear some other opinions.)

By the way, I have a similar reaction to the use of husk as a verb meaning to speak in a husky tone. "Oh, Lord Errol," she husked, "my maidenhead is not for sale."

(Though I did use it myself once -- but it was in a humorous/satiric /one might even say, snarky piece.)

Cranky Monday -- Only Two . . .

Only two of the many spelling/usage errors that I've noticed recently.

 One is Woah! used in the sense of Stop! or Hold on there!  Shouldn't it be Whoa! as said to stop a horse?

The other is Here, here! used to signify agreement.  This is awfully common but I looked it up to be sure that I was correct in believing it should be Hear! Hear!

I was. It derives from Hear him! Hear him! -- used in approval during a speech. Kinda like spontaneous Amen's during a sermon.

What about you? Are there any annoying bits of ill-used language that make you grit your teeth or reach for a red pencil? 

Even Your Best Friends Won't Tell You

Or is that just what friends are for -- to tell you that there's something green caught between your front teeth before you walk into a room full of people or to mention that your deodorant seems to have failed before you leave for that all-important interview?

As an ex-English teacher, I am always jarred by faulty punctuation and misspellings. I'm not one of those folks who carry around Magic Markers to correct signs but I do notice and it does bother me.

The blogosphere is full of such mistakes and, for the most part, I just shake my head and move on. I would never correct a stranger -- it's not that big a deal.

But what about when it's someone who's a friend? And a fellow writer? There have been instances of agents or publishers reading the blogs of prospective clients. So if you're an aspiring writer, posting your work in a public place, isn't it to your advantage to have it error-free?

I bring this up because I finally got up my nerve to correct someone I know -- privately, of course. Comments are NOT the place for such. And I think this person is still speaking to me.

One of mistakes I see most often is addressed on the first page of this invaluable reference book,
Here it is:

IT'S means it is, as in "It's a cold day in Hell."

ITS (no apostrophe) is possessive, as in "The dog rolled its eyes."

And, for the most part, plurals don't need apostrophes. As in "They threw the eggs (not egg's) at the busybody, ex-English teacher."

And misspellings! The spell check feature isn't perfect but it's worth using every time before you post, even if you're a pretty good speller. (I just found out I'd misspelled -- or mistyped -- apostrophe. You can imagine how much I don't want to make a mistake in this particular post.)

Enough for today. I won't even mention how people, including newspaper reporters and TV anchors, misuse the verbs lie and lay.

I'll just let sleeping dogs lie.

Signs and Portents

a

For some years now, ever since a friend alerted me to the fact that the Mayan calendar says the end of the world will occur on December 3, 2012, I've kept that date on my desk with the notation 'PLAN AHEAD.' Now, it seems, we have only about two weeks.

Oh dear, oh dear . . .

It's hardly worth bothering even reading the Sun's article '7 SUPERFOODS TO FIGHT EVERY KNOWN DISEASE,' much less taking the trouble to incorporate them into my diet. No, with so little time remaining I'm tempted to recreate a sandwich I had in England a few years ago -- Brie and (English) bacon snuggled into a heavily buttered baguette. Now that's a sandwich.

I'd laugh off this latest apocalyptic warning -- I was laughing it off -- till early this morning, reading The New York Times headlines on the internet, I was shocked (shocked, I say!) to see that this venerable and conservative (grammatically, at least) old lady of a newspaper had used, in a headline, It's as a possessive, when we all know it's is the contraction for It is. By the time I got ready to write this post, the mistake had been corrected but still . .

Could this indeed be the beginning of the end? Signs and portents . . .



And though mail service may be ended and we'll all be too busy to worry about such things by the time I receive my early author's copies, you can still leave a comment to be entered in a drawing to win an early copy of In A Dark Season. The 31st is the last day to enter and I'll announce the winner on April 1.